My intentions for this blog have been to be as transparent as I possibly could be. Why? Well, I want my writings or the happenings of my life to not only reflect the goodness and grace of Jesus but to also encourage and inspire you, my reader, by my victories, trials, struggles, or blessings.
So I guess this post leads me to bearing my heart and soul with how I’ve been struggling. The past couple of weeks have been seemingly more than I could bear. This winter season has hit me hard. Still accommodating to a new area in which I live, missing my man as he works very long hours (recently 10 straight days in a row), suffering through a severe sickness for weeks and being confined to the couch, feeling alone with no family nearby,having my car break down, dealing with frozen water pipes, and bearing through the winter blues has taken its toll on my body, spirit, and soul. And these were just a few of the struggles that I had been faced with.
I became discouraged which led to a bout of feeling depressed. I felt myself sinking and having no strength to resist the urges of ungratefulness. I was losing sight of the blessings surrounding me and was beginning to lose all of my contentment I had found in Jesus. Down deep inside, I felt like I deserved better. Didn’t God desire my best? Why was He allowing me to suffer with a multitude of trials that were overwhelming me? After all, I’m a newlywed – shouldn’t I still be dancing among the roses?!
It was during this time, that I took a little trip back home to visit my family. God used this time to strengthen my heart. Not only did He use my mother’s “pep talks” to encourage me 🙂 but He used my family’s love and care along with my mother’s wisdom to get my eyes back on my Saviour. Sure I enjoyed a little R&R eating delicious meals, playing games, and shopping; but more importantly, I was encouraged to stop believing the lies of the enemy and to fully and whole-heartedly put my faith and trust in God. He is my El Shaddai. Can I completely trust Him to fulfill my every need? I was being selfish and looking upon my own circumstances and wanting my Lord and my husband to make my life easy and more accommodating but that’s not what God has planned for my life.
The Christian life isn’t easy. Taking up my cross and becoming a servant to all isn’t easy. Being a homemaker isn’t always easy especially suffering through a bout of illness. Remaining strong when you feel all alone isn’t easy. To put on a smile and hide back tears of disappointment isn’t easy. To hold your tongue when you want to prove a point isn’t easy. Choosing to be grateful instead of complaining isn’t easy either. But that’s what I’ve been called to. I’ve been called to “put on” the mind of my Saviour (Philippians 2:5). Because if and when I do, I shall be more like Him. I will be able to bring Him glory and praise. And that’s the true purpose for my life. Jesus humbled himself and became obedient. And that’s what I am called to do. To esteem others better than myself, to give thanks in all things, to care not for the things of this world, to take no thought of my future and trust God completely….these are the things that exemplify true Christianity.
So, my dear reader, if you are having a difficult day – take hope. I’m no expert when it comes to crawling out of the pit of discouragement but realize that you are not alone. Not only, are there others who are
struggling too (we don’t all have picture-perfect lives that Facebook or Instagram may seem to reflect) but you have a Friend who sticks closer than a brother. He understands your every emotion and He will provide for your every need. Make the choice to trust Him no matter what and find the joy you once had to being budding in your heart again!